Thursday, September 10, 2009

Poor silly little Republican girl.

I just got a call that said "Political Call" on my caller ID. I gleefully answered the phone expecting the pleasure of bursting some staffers bubble. The nice thing about being a Libertarian is that both parties offer me things to argue against. On the other end of the phone was a girl sounding about fourteen but probably a year or two older. "Hi I am so an so from the Republican something something committee" (I am not redacting she just wasn't a very clear speaker) I said "HI, what can I do for you today?" She started with "Do you consider yourself Republican, Democrat or Independent" I said "Libertarian" She said "Wow like Libertarian uhhm ok" "Well" she said "We are looking for support in opposing the liberal agenda" "Sounds like my cup of tea" I said (yes I do talk like that sometimes) "Which portions of the liberal agenda are we opposing?"

Her: Well uhhm like higher taxes and taking control of our money

Me: Yes I certainly oppose that, of course both parties are into doing that, your party likes to hide it in deficit spending instead of direct extortion but we get screwed the same in the end."

Her: Uhhhm ok well we want to stop that and have less government control

Me: Excellent what intrusive laws will we be repealing?

Her: Excuse me

Me What particular things are we going to be working on removing government control over.

Her uhhm we do the pro life.

Me: Oh no I am very pro choice, I want less government control not more.

Her: (To her credit she dropped the pro life thing instead of trying to argue. Killed my fun but pretty smart) We are like pro military.

Me: Oh yes me too, we need to get them home and stop fighting foreign wars. We need to fix the focus of our military away from ever doing anything outside of our borders.

Her: UH yeah well uhmm we oppose the socialized health care.

Me: Really, I hadn't heard. (a little over the top on the sarcasm I admit) Well I can agree there, we definitely need a better solution than anything the government is offering, something market driven. I can back you up on this issue, are you looking for someone to write letters to congressmen or newspapers?

Her: Uhh no we are looking for donations to fund our work.

Me:...........Ha Ha Oh sorry I didn't know this was a money call, I give to Libertarian causes.

Her. OH ok G'nite.

She was far from the worst political caller I have ever had, but it was obvious she had zero knowledge of the issues she was trying to oppose. None. Even if I were into furthering the Repugnican agenda I wouldn't have given any money to someone who couldn't even detail what they were trying to accomplish. I have to give the Dems credit for at least one thing, they get the smarter fangirls.

This is a cross post from my personal blog


  1. You handled that hilariously well!


  2. The only political calls I get are recordings. I usually just say "Fuck you" and hang up.

  3. I'm surprised someone who actually calls themself a Republican was able to operate a phone.

    Was there a Democrat call in the past where the person actually sort of understood the issues, or are you just being kind?

  4. Ginx, yes I have had a few Democrats who called and gave me rousing discussions. All women, I think they put the girls on the phones hoping to profit off of chivalry. One even got a donation.

  5. Well, statistically there are more women who are Democrats AND women volunteer at a higher rate than men.

  6. Ginx both are true but the Repugs seem to put mostly ladies on the phones as well, at least the ones who call me. You are right it could be because women volunteer more, however I know collection companies tend to prefer women on the phones because men are more likely to be polite and want to please them. It seems to me that fundraising call centers would want to do the same.

  7. Republican and Libertarian are virtually the same thing these days. Libertarians are becomming Republicans to oppose the national Socialist Democrats, and GOPers are moving Libertarian on civil liberties issues like seat belt laws, nanny-state issues, smoking bans, ect...

    So, the answer to the phone caller was a bit rude, and uncalled for on your part.

    Hopefully next time when a Republican calls you as a self-described Libertarian will whip out your credit card and give them a contribution $$$, or offer to walk precincts to elect good Libertarian/Republican candidates.


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