"It's like losing your keys! The only thing worse is losing your keys or your wallet!"
"But, Dad, you hardly use your cell phone and you almost never go anywhere except up to the Walmart down the street."
Well, I didn't actually give that response to my dad, but I was thinking it. He was using my mom's cell phone when I spoke to him yesterday. He went out to a few places, including the post office and the grocery store, and when he got back home, his cell phone was missing! Yes, it needs an exclamation point. He was upset about it, and told me he went back to retrace his steps. He spent several hours going up and down parking lots, visiting the clerks at the various places he'd stopped, to ask if anyone had turned in a cell phone (they hadn't, which cause Dad to launch into one of his "I've lost my faith in humanity!" speeches) and then walking up and down every aisle to see if he could find it himself. He keeps his cell phone in a little case that he hooks to his belt, but he admits it can slip off from time to time, though usually only when he sits down.
"Did you sit down anywhere?" I asked.
"Only in the car, and I checked it and it wasn't anywhere."
Now, his cell phone is really old (2004) and he's been wanting a new one anyway (he just wants one with a camera) so I told him to just call and let them know he'd lost it and have them deactivate the old phone and send him a new one. So, his new phone is scheduled to arrive today. I'll probably try to call him later today or tomorrow (I call several times a week) to test it, if he's figured it out by then.
My mom also had a recent incident with her cell phone. She went to the store, and in the checkout lane she opened her purse and her cell phone fell out. She picked it up and when she got home, she noticed it wasn't working. She thought it just needed to be charged, but when she plugged it in, she got the message that "a battery is required". Upon opening it up, it was discovered the battery was missing! (yes, the exclamation points keep coming with Mom and Dad).
"It must have fallen out when you dropped it," I explained to her. "Didn't you notice there was no battery?"
"NO, I just put it back together and didn't think about it," she replied.
It turned out okay, because Mom called the store and one of the checkers found it under the magazine rack.
I wonder how a technology so recent to their lives has suddenly become something to absolutely panic about when they don't have it for a day or so. What the hell did people do before cell phones? But I guess we could ask that about cars, television, air conditioning (how did people live in the desert before air conditioning?) the Internet, just about anything.
All I know is, if I ever lose my cell phone I'll be kidnapped by the state and taken against my will for psychiatric observation.