Sunday, November 7, 2010

Religions of the World

  • Taoism: Shit Happens
  • Hinduism: This Shit Happened Before
  • Islam: If Shit Happens, Take A Hostage
  • Buddhism: When Shit Happens Is It Really Shit?
  • Seventh Day Adventist: Shit Happens On Saturday
  • Protestantism: Shit Won't Happen If I Work Harder
  • Catholicism: If Shit Happens, I Deserve It
  • Jehovah's Witness: Knock, Knock, "Shit Happens"
  • Judaism: Why Does Shit Always Happen To Me?
  • Hare Krishna: Shit Happens Rama Rama Ding Dong
  • Atheism: No Shit
  • T.V. Evangelism: Send More Shit
  • Rastafarianism: Let's Smoke This Shit

So let's say that you're not a believer in a particular faith or religion at this time, but that you've come to believe that there might be more to the world than atheism suggests (no, I'm not talking about myself) and you conclude that if there is a God, He/She has probably spoken to us. Some crackpot "philosopher" might make the argument that the Christian scriptures, even if flawed, are more reliable and believable than the Koran for example; that might be an argument for choosing Christianity over another religion simply because it comes "closer" to whatever must be the truth about God. I reject such silliness outright. Searching for the ultimate truth about reality and the meaning of life in what are obviously ancient human-created documents that were not written with any objectivity in mind, but instead to give support to a belief system that the authors had already committed to, is a waste of time.

So few seem able, as in the political realm regarding the state, to think outside these little boxes of human construction. I can easily imagine God, if I were of a mind to, as not having inspired any religion or "revelation". God would just be God, but not a god small enough to conform to the delusions of the religious devotee.

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