Sunday, June 12, 2011

Sundays with Brother Howard Cramping

Welcome to the Open Bore 'Em! This Bible question and answer show is hosted by world renowned prophet of the end times, Howard Cramping. Here at Family and Friends Radio, Brother Cramping has dedicated many years to answering your Bible questions as accurately as possible. A nuclear physicist, Mr. Cramping has the sharp mind suited to the task of uncovering the Bible's secrets, including the date of the return of Christ in glory to destroy this wicked world. So now, here is your host of the Open Bore 'Em, Howard Cramping!

Well good afternoon or evening or whatever it is where you are. Shall we once again delve into God's word for the answers we all seek to life's questions? After all, we know truth is ONLY in the Bible, so let us thank God for giving it to us and shall we take our first call...Welcome to Open Bore 'Em!

Yes, Dr. Cramping?

Yes, but I'm not a doctor. What is your question?

Not a doctor? But I just heard that guy in the introduction call you a nuclear physicist.

Well, yes, but I only earned an associates degree in mathematics. I did take a course on physics once. But what is your Bible question today?

Well, Brother Cramping, I think that's a mighty important point, if you're calling yourself a nuclear physicist...

Excuse me! Exxxxxcuuuuuuse meeeee! I NEVER, NEVER said any such thing about myself. That would be the super terrible sin of lying and Almighty God hates a liar altogether. But thank you for sharing and calling and may we please take our next call. Welcome to the Open Bore 'Em!

Yes, hi Mr. Cramping! How are you?

I'm doing quite well, thank you! What is your Bible question?

Mr. Cramping, if Jesus is coming back, how come you're the only one who knows what the date is? How come all the other Christians in the world haven't figured it out? Are you being deceived by the devil?

Excuse me! Exccccccccccccccccccuse Me! The truth of the Bible is there for ANYONE to see, but remember, it takes years of study and we have to compare scripture with scripture, otherwise we will be deceived by our own pride. You talk about other Christians, but we first have to ask ourselves, are they really Christians? Remember, all the churches are now under the control of Satan! Of course they won't see the truth that Jesus is coming back on October 31, ironically, Satan's own day of deception know as Halloween! What an evil day that is! But God has His plan, and what a day for Jesus to return and destroy all the sinful people in their wickedness on the very day they're going out dressed like demons to get free candy! God is not mocked. Oh what a terrible dreadful day that will be! But thank God if we are a true believer, on that day, instead of a costume of some devil, we'll be clothed in our new eternal spiritual bodies. Oh my, won't that be something! But thank you for sharing and calling!

You've been listening to the Open Bore 'Em, presented each Sunday by Family and Friends Radio. Tune in next week to hear Mr. Cramping say: "Excuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse Meeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Thanks for listening!

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