Saturday, March 13, 2010

Barbie and the Meat Thermometer Stabber

Two stories over the past few days have inspired this post. The black Barbie Walmart story is the funnier of the two, a near parody of the politically correct mindset. The story of Walmart's run-in with the "racism" police could have come right out of the pages of The Onion.

So a Walmart store put some black Barbies on clearance sale, for $3.00, about half what the white Barbies right next to them were selling for. A Walmart spokeswoman gave the sensible answer that "Pricing like items differently is a part of inventory management in retailing". But, according to Thelma Dye ("executive director of the Northside Center for Child Development") this is "devaluing the black doll". It's racism, folks! Can't you see it? Walmart hates black people (uh, no, I mean devalues black people).

But maybe, if we're looking for insane, delusional explanations for why Walmart lowers the price on a certain item, maybe this means that Walmart values their black costumers MORE than their white customers. Think about it. Walmart wants to save black people more money than they want to save white people. A clear case of reverse discrimination. Get ready for a white people class action lawsuit, Walmart!

But if crazy loon Ms. Thelma Dye is right, and price equals value, then what would she have said if the black Barbie had been priced at twice the amount of the white Barbie? Would she say that Walmart values blackness more than whiteness? A $12.00 black Barbie and a $6.00 white Barbie, side by side. How would she and her fellow "racism" police respond? I'm sure you know the answer. Though there might be just the slightest possibility that they would claim that Walmart was exploiting black people by selling the black version of the doll at a higher price, thus once again exposing Walmart as racist.

And correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't there more whites in the U.S. than there are blacks? It's a simple demographic observation, meant only to offer the possible explanation that white dolls sell more because there are more people to buy them. If black dolls aren't selling, the price comes down, as in supply and demand, something it appears Ms. Dye has never heard of. But then, when you have a statist, collectivist ideology (and I make no claim that such applies in Ms. Dye's case), you have no need to know such basic economic facts.

But let's forget about Barbie for a moment and go to the movies (but please, not a Barbie movie) and while we're watching let's pretend an obnoxious person behind us decides to have a conversation on her cell phone while the movie is playing. Let's shush her, shall we? Then let's sit back, relax, and get stabbed in the neck with a meat thermometer by the woman's black boyfriend. Hopefully, we, the shusher, are white, so that the black stabber can claim racism and that we "devalued" his girlfriend and his blackness. His stabbing us with a meat thermometer is thus only a natural response to centuries of white racism and discrimination against blacks.

According to sheriff's officials, the suspects were described as black males. One man was wearing an orange hat with an orange jersey and the other man was dressed in a black hooded sweatshirt.
-Moviegoer Tells Woman to Stop Talking On Cell Phone, Gets Stabbed in the Neck

There was no word on why the man had a meat thermometer in a movie theater.

Well, obviously to stab shushers in the neck when they dare to shush your girlfriend. Come to the movies prepared, I always say. Now, the story doesn't say if the victim evil shusher was black or white, but if he was white, by golly, it's racism for sure, and the stabber was the real victim, not even able to afford a decent weapon to carry with him to the movies, also no doubt do to prejudice in the workplace that prevents him earning enough to buy a better stabbing device.

Hey, it makes as much sense as the Barbie story, doesn't it?


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