Sunday, April 8, 2012

Eddie Goes Bananas #1

"Eddie can you hear me? I ask again, Eddie can you hear me? You were supposed to be coming soooooon!"


"Oh my God, was that Eddie?"

"Yep! That was him alright. And I'd be careful cause he might go bananas"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, for starters, Eddies ain't no human. He's an ape."

Just then Brett came up to the two and said, "Apes is just like us humans. There be no difference. You think you so special cause you human? No way man!"

"Are you on drugs again dude?"

"Hell no" said Brett. "My damn cell phone got runned over and it had my drug dealer's phone numbers in it."

"So, let me get this straight. If George Zimmerman had killed a dog, that would have made him just as bad as he is killing Trayvon?"

Brett looked confused. "What?"

"Well, if a dog life is just as good as a human, if there is no difference between animals and people, like you imply, then killing a dog is just as bad as killing a boy. Maybe worse."

"What are you talking about?", Brett asked.

"Well, at least dogs don't go around stealing jewelry."

Just then Eddies came back on his cycle, but slower this time. When he stopped he pulled up to the three of them and took off his helmet. Damn, but if he didn't look like an ape.

"See," Brett said. "Now don't tell me apes and others non-humans aren't just like us. They can ride motorcycles and everything".

That's when Eddie pulled his gorilla mask off and jumped off his bike.

"You gonna go bananas?" Brett asked him. Brett seemed completely unfazed that his facts were proven wrong (as they nearly always were) and that Eddie wasn't really an ape after all.

"I am not an animal!" shouted Eddie. "I am a human being!" That's when Eddie punched Brett right in the mouth.

"Damn Eddies, looks like you hurt Brett real bad."

"Nobody compares me to an ape," said Eddie. "Nobody!"

Eddie got back on his ride and zoomed out of there in a hurry. It wouldn't be the last they would see of him, though. Not by a long shot.

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