Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Be Prepared

For anything, like getting stabbed in the back by a blogger you once believed in, a blogger who you called "friend", a blogger who then continues with the snide remarks, the deliberate attempts to insult and hurt, the blogger who...Oh, sorry, I was distracted thinking about Bret Alan.

I was just going to do a little post on my day yesterday, and how I planned it out so I wouldn't get stuck with nothing to do. My mom did a really stupid thing (not for the first time) and so was forced to refinance her car loan (a result of a different, earlier stupid thing she did) and I had to drive her because she is still recovering from the results of an accident (that happened because she made a stupid decision to go on a trip she shouldn't have) she suffered back in October (more on that later, in fact, it will be a whole series of posts on the whole stupid affair).

So, to cut to the chase, I brought with me the following items:

  1. A bottle of Arrowhead water.
  2. A packet of Emergen-C
  3. A ripe banana (you didn't think I'd bring an unripe one, did you?)
  4. A book (for reading)

So, I drove my mom to the place. There was a minor incident when some old bitch came around claiming, from at least 20 or 30 feet away, and from the other side of her car (so that in actual fact, she couldn't have seen anything), that she saw her Jeep "move" when we got out of Mom's car, and that we put a mark on her precious, ugly lime-green rear fender! I told the old hag matter-of-factly that no, we did not, that I was watching the whole time (I wasn't, of course) and that nothing of the kind occurred. Mom kept saying "She's gonna take down my license plate number and say we hit her car, I know it" and even after the nasty wrinkled whore was joined by her stupid, dumb ass husband, and the two old farts got in their Jeep and drove off, Mom was asking "are they writing down my license?"

After that it was simply a matter of waiting, and luckily I didn't have to bring my own bench and water fountain, they were already sitting out in front of the building, where I settled myself in the shade (though the stupid bench was designed with a ridge that stuck right in your back, making my rest there less than completely pleasant) and listened to the water falling while I first opened my powered vitamin C and poured it into my water, drank it down, peeled my banana, ate it, threw the peel onto the walk, hoping another nasty old bag would come along and slip on it, changed my mind, picked the peel up and tossed it into the garbage can next to the bench, then finally opened my book and had a relaxing read until Mom emerged from inside the office she'd entered and I could drive her back home, then spend the rest of the afternoon reading, watching television, and eating.

All in all a pretty fine day, but think how it might not have been if I hadn't been prepared.

1 comment:

  1. This makes me want to put together a zombie-apocalypse kit. Sorry, my mind is like... out there today.


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